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I WATCH….

Posted on by cepcarol

My Notebook: Printed Pages – 12

By C.E. Pereira

…Dementia become a living hell
…Dementia feed the nightmare you can never wake up from
…And I am angry, for I cannot reason with Dementia
…Dementia create these bars of prison
…Dementia feed like glutton on your fears
…Dementia, like a B-grade horror movie
…Hallucinations emerge from Dementia’s world
…Dementia spew obscenities from your mouth
….Dementia distort your reality slowly and deliberately
…Dementia spread its virus that corrupts your mind
…Dementia replay your worst fears in you
…Dementia make you cry like a child
…Dementia turn your face into hate and anger
…Dementia make you laugh and curse at the same time
…Dementia make you call me by anothers’ name
…Dementia make you think I am someone else
…Dementia destroy your confidence
…Dementia take control of your mind
…Dementia take you away from us

Author:

I'm a Eurasian of Portuguese, English, Scottish and Malay heritage. And my extended family are of Chinese and Indian heritage. In recent years, the younger generation have added on to include spouses from the Philippines, Nigeria and Russia. My world is made up of different colours like the rainbow. And like the rainbow I am unique. Reading is my form of relaxation, to escape from the drudgery of daily life and enter into a world of the imagination. It is the love of reading that has led me to try my hand in writing short stories and poems. I hope that in some way my stories and poems will take you for a little while away from the drudgery of the present into the pages of imagination. To new friends found, I bid you, Welcome. Sincerely, C.E. Pereira

8 thoughts on “I WATCH….”

  1. I am choking back sobs…because I KNOW this poem. I lived these exact moments. And though I am two years removed from the daily onslaught, I was forever changed by going through this.
    I send you so much love.

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    1. I’m sorry it brought back such painful memories. You understand the daily turmoil I’m going through. I ask God every day to take her home. I thank you for your sharing. I send you much love and hugs.

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      1. The memories are painful, but I wouldn’t have changed a thing. If I could offer you one thing, it is that no matter how hard this time is for you…you are a brave and beautiful soul for being there…for helping your mom. I was fortunate to have my real mom break through every once in a while and I cherish those memories. In fact, when I really needed her one time…and I mean REALLY NEEDED HER…she came through and eased my pain with a horrible decision. I am forever grateful ❤ I am here for you anytime…please know I mean it. Sweet Blessings ❤

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  2. Oh Dear heart what a sad and overwhelming time this is for you…. I pray you will focus on the day when your mum will not be suffering and will be restored to complete wholeness, as this life takes so much from us as we endure many afflictions, yet the day will come when Gods promises will hold true when there will be no more disease, tears, and sadness. Your mum will be as she always was and this time will be remembered no more. Sometimes looking to the eternal brings us comfort in the now. You will be in my prayers, and remember there is always hope for those in the Lord.
    Julia

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    1. It is sometimes overwhelming, hence I write it down. It is my way of coping. I do hope that others will have a better understanding of what this sickness does. With this pandemic we are all so isolated and cut off from everything normal. When I write my fears on paper it releases the tension in my mind. Your words have helped like a balm on my heart. Thank you for you care and concern. God bless you Julia. Stay safe, be safe.
      Carol

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