You have not apologised

Friendship spanning decades.
Four friends in a fix.
One day three were hurt.
Callously hurt by one.

Friendship demolished.
Yesterday’s memories.
Today all shattered.
A gloom spreading.

At first I let it slide.
Hurt was all I felt.
Until I tasted bile within.
Now anger is festering.

The light flickers.
Darkness is creeping in.
I don’t want you in my life.
I want to erase you out.

A letter written to you.
This friend took the first step.
Laying out a bleeding heart.
You apologised through sender.

Yet, I don’t forgive you.
Does this make me heartless?
All I got was a forwarded message.
Long since deleted. Erased!

Shame for not forgiving.
Yet, I remain stubborn.
Everyone makes mistakes.
God forgives, why can’t I?

How will I face God?
Fear grips my heart.
I am trapped by emotions.
Of hurt, anger and pride.

Can this be mended?
A hurt I cannot forgive.
How can forgiveness start?
You have not apologised.

By C.E. Pereira